Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Advice to new moms

To those of my bloggy friends who are expecting their first child, or who are hoping to conceive soon, I really only have one piece of advice. Take things one day at a time. There are about 4325135 things I could tell you I wish I had known before I became a mother, but the truth is, I read the books. I talked to other moms. And I still didn't feel "prepared" until I did it myself. Parenting is one of those things that you just have to do to know how you're going to do it.

When I was pregnant, I had all these ideas about how things would be. According to the plans in my head, I would have a fantastic vaginal birth. I would breastfeed without issue for at least six months. I would never bedshare with my baby. I would limit his TV time and read books to him constantly.

Well, then I became a mother, and it was amazing how many of my plans changed in an instant. After going into labor on my own, I had a long labor followed by a c-section. I had tons of issues breastfeeding and ended up switching Colin to formula at around 4 weeks of age. Exhausted and desperate, I brought him into bed with me sometimes when nothing else worked. And, let's face it - the hubs and I can both recite every word to the theme songs of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Special Agent Oso and Jungle Junction.

Colin @ 10 months and Mommy
The point is, you have to do what's best for you and your baby. You have to take things one day at a time and expect the unexpected. And most importantly, you have to learn to be flexible. As soon as you accept that there will be a LOT of things beyond your control, you'll be a better parent. That's how it was for me, anyway. I was SO unsure about being a new mom, and how to know exactly what this fragile little creature wanted and needed from me, but once I had a chance to care for him and be his mommy, I learned the ins and outs of my baby. I got to know all of his little quirks, and after a while, we got into a nice rhythm. If you're unsure right now, don't worry. Things will fall into place. If you're not unsure yet, you probably haven't given birth. Just a heads up: you WILL experience the uncertainty that we all have in the beginning. You WILL have moments of fear, exhaustion, and you will wonder "am I doing this right?" Those thoughts are natural, and they simply mean that you are a good mother and that you want what's best for your child.

The bottom line: you can do it. 


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6 comments:

Mama G @ Growing Up Geeky said...

WORD

Jennifer said...

Great post!

Jenny said...

very true. In the end you have to figure it out on your own, and not to make yourself crazy with expectations.

Sarah [NurseLovesFarmer.com] said...

Very well said, Katie!

Jennybee said...

You are awesome for this post! Thank you!! Did you see my latest post?? :)

Summer said...

Great advice! Being flexible is huge when raising a child. Being a former control freak, it was hard to adapt to this mentality, but it's so necessary.