To the Parents of Strong Willed Toddlers

Before I had children, I did a lot of silent judging. I would see a two year old freaking out about something dumb in a restaurant or at the grocery store and I'd think, "MY kids will never act like that." Surely children, regardless of age, were a reflection of their parents.

It's true that parenting matters, at any age. But the thing I didn't know back then is that parenting is all about sowing seeds so that as your kids get older and understand more about the world around them, they will blossom into kind, well-mannered, well-rounded people. Parenting isn't a sprint; it's a marathon. And sometimes in those early days, your kids WILL turn into little devils and embarrass you in public. Or in our case, they will fight bedtime tooth and nail and force you to go all Supernanny on their little behinds.

At almost three years old, Colin is all about control. He wants to be the one to dictate what happens and when. He does not like being told no or having to leave somewhere if he's having a good time. Example: he has this thing right now where he likes to get in the driver's seat of my car and pretend to drive. He'll turn on the headlights and push or turn all the buttons or dials. The first time, it was kind of cute, but then it got old pretty fast. Now, as soon as I put the car in park, he'll say "momma, I want to drive." When I unbuckle his car seat, and then go to get Reid out of the car, he'll jump in the front and start "driving." God forbid I ask him to get out before he's ready. Sidenote: It's also super fun to get in the car each morning not knowing which buttons or knobs he's messed with. Typically the windshield wipers and high beams are on.

For a long time, we had a "pick your battles" approach, and to an extent we still do. But because Colin is so stubborn and persistent, we have had to buckle down and reinforce that no means no, which is hard. When he's whining because he wants something, or crying because he wants me to lay down with him until he falls asleep, it would be so easy just to cave and give him what he wants. And sometimes, I'll be honest, we do cave. But in my opinion it's important to think long term, and to stick with our guns now to avoid even bigger battles later.

And speaking of later, I'm afraid we may have two strong willed little monkeys on our hands. My little Reid has always been so sweet and laid back, but at almost a year old, we're starting to see some of the same little behavior patterns we saw in Colin at an early age. Lord help us. He is definitely going to be persistent like his big brother. Heck, maybe that's where he got it. Regardless, I think the early days are going to be tough, but in the long run, my hope is that we'll have two level headed, self motivated, intelligent sons.

So to the other parents of strong willed toddlers out there: Hang in there, and keep up the good work. I promise it won't be in vain.